Christi Young, LPC

Compassion Instead of Empathy: A More Grounded, Biblical Way to Love

For many people, anxiety doesn’t arrive loudly during the day—it waits until the house is quiet, the lights are low, and there’s nothing left to distract the mind. At night, thoughts about unfinished tasks, missed opportunities, and perceived failures rise to the surface. What often follows is a painful internal narrative: I didn’t do enough. I should be further along. If I try again tomorrow, I’ll probably mess it up. Night anxiety rooted in disappointment with oneself is es

There are seasons in marriage when love feels steady and mutual—and seasons when it feels confusing, volatile, or frightening. When a spouse is experiencing delusions, paranoia, or distorted thinking, conflict often escalates quickly. Words twist. Motives are questioned. Reality itself can feel contested. In these moments, the greatest danger is not simply the conflict—it is the quiet erosion of self . Over time, you may begin to wonder who you are, what is true, or whether c

Few things are as painful as a friendship marked by misunderstanding. You replay conversations, wonder what went wrong, and hope that with time the other person will come to a place of understanding. Yet you are left in an uncomfortable in-between—unsure whether to keep reaching out or quietly step back. Christian faith does not demand that we cling to every relationship at all costs. Nor does it invite us to withdraw at the first sign of discomfort. Wisdom lies in discernmen

Many couples quietly live inside a painful pattern that feels confusing and exhausting.One spouse pulls away.The other reaches out—pursuing, pleading, or begging for closeness.Reconnection happens, hope rises…Then distance returns again. Over time, this cycle erodes trust and emotional safety. You may find yourself asking, Are we healing—or just repeating the same heartbreak? Christian counseling recognizes this pattern not as a failure of faith or commitment, but as a relat

Anger is one of the most misunderstood emotions in the Christian life. Many believers assume that feeling angry means they have failed spiritually. Yet Scripture does not condemn anger itself—it warns us about what happens when anger takes control. “In your anger do not sin.”  (Ephesians 4:26) Anger is a signal, not a sin. It alerts us to perceived injustice, threat, hurt, or boundary violation. The challenge is not whether anger arises, but how we respond when it does . Chri

When your spouse is experiencing psychotic delusions, daily life can feel confusing, emotionally charged, and unpredictable. You may find yourself monitoring your words, your tone, and even your thoughts—afraid that one misstep will escalate fear or anger. Over time, a deeper fear can emerge: the fear of being controlled, or of losing control of your own life, voice, or safety. Scripture calls us to compassion—but it also calls us to wisdom, truth, and protection of the heart

A Christian Counseling Perspective on Difficult Friendships Friendships are meant to bring mutual encouragement, growth, and connection. Scripture reminds us that “a friend loves at all times”  (Proverbs 17:17), yet the Bible also speaks honestly about wisdom, boundaries, and the influence relationships have on our hearts. Not every difficult friendship is meant to be kept at all costs—and not every conflict means it’s time to walk away. Christian discernment asks a deeper qu

It Is Formed by Doing What Is Good, True, and Life-Giving Many Christians grow up learning faith as a list of “don’ts.” Don’t drink. Don’t lust. Don’t complain. Don’t get angry. Don’t rest too much. Don’t want too much. While boundaries matter, mental health is not formed by emptiness. It is not created by merely not  doing harmful things. A soul does not heal through avoidance alone. Mental health is cultivated through intentional engagement with what is good, beautiful, mea

Discovering that your spouse has been looking at pornography can feel shocking, painful, and deeply destabilizing. Many spouses describe a sudden mix of grief, anger, confusion, betrayal, and self-doubt. From a Christian counseling perspective, it is important to say this clearly: your reaction makes sense . This kind of discovery affects trust, attachment, and one’s sense of safety within the marriage. This moment does not define you, your worth, or the entire future of your