Exhausted but Enough: Believing You Can Be a Good Mom When You Come from Wounded Roots

Christi Young
Jul 5
6 min read

You’re tired. Not just from sleepless nights or busy days, but with a deep weariness that comes from carrying not only today’s burdens but also the weight of yesterday—the wounds of your own childhood, the fear of repeating patterns you long to break.

You wonder: Am I enough? Am I becoming like the parents who let me down? Can I be a good mom when I feel so weak?

Pause, take a breath, and receive this truth: Your love, your reflection, your desire to do better are proof that you are already enough. And where you fall short, God’s grace fills the gap.

Why Motherhood Stirs Up Old Wounds

Motherhood is a season of profound change. As the book What to Expect When You’re Expecting reminds us, pregnancy and new motherhood often bring memories of our own childhood to the surface. If your parents were exhausted, distant, or unable to meet your needs, those memories may now feel sharp, especially on your hardest days.

But God has given you a new story to write. “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!” (2 Corinthians 5:17). Your past influences you, but it doesn’t define you.

Some key ideas from the book Bridges Not Walls that can guide you

🌿 Connection requires risk and honesty.

Bridges Not Walls is a book about human connection—what builds it, what breaks it, and how we can choose honesty, courage, and compassion in our relationships. Its core message applies beautifully to motherhood: Bridges Not Walls teaches that authentic connection grows when we dare to be real. The Bible echoes this: “Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are all members of one body.” (Ephesians 4:25). When you say to your child, “I’m tired, but I’m here” or “I’m sorry I lost my temper, I love you,” you are living out biblical love—love that is humble, truthful, and willing to repair.

🌿 Walls are built when we withdraw, hide, or pretend. The pressure to seem strong or perfect can lead us to hide our struggles—but this builds walls. The Bible reminds us, “God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble.” (James 4:6). True strength is found in humility: showing up as we are, trusting that God’s grace will meet us there. Your child doesn’t need a perfect mom—they need a present one, willing to let love bridge the gap.

🌿 Listening matters more than talking. Bridges Not Walls highlights how deep connection comes through listening. Scripture calls us to the same: “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.” (James 1:19). Listening to your child’s heart, to their unspoken needs, to their fears—this builds trust. And listening to your own heart—tuning in to where you need rest, grace, or support—helps you love from a place of wholeness.

🌿 Building bridges is an ongoing choice. Connection is not a one-time act; it’s a daily choice. Bridges Not Walls reminds us that we won’t always get it right—but we can always come back, try again, and choose love. This echoes Proverbs 24:16: “Though the righteous fall seven times, they rise again.” It’s not about getting it perfect. It’s about returning, repairing, and choosing love over and over.

What Makes a Good Mom (In God’s Eyes)

It isn’t boundless energy. It isn’t never losing your temper. It isn’t perfect control. A good mom:

🌿 Leads with love. “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8).Love doesn’t mean you’ll never mess up—it means you return with kindness and care.

🌿 Practices gentleness. “Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” (Philippians 4:5).Gentleness isn’t weakness. It’s strength under God’s guidance, especially in hard moments.

🌿 Seeks wisdom. “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” (James 1:5).You don’t have to figure this out alone. God delights in helping you parent with wisdom.

🌿 Walks in grace. God’s mercy is new every morning (Lamentations 3:22-23). You can begin again each day.

How to Trust You’re Enough — Even When You’re Exhausted

✅ Notice your inner dialogue. When fear whispers, “You’re failing,” pause. Replace it with God’s truth: “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)

✅ Focus on small connections. A smile, a gentle word, a hand on your child’s shoulder—these matter more than grand gestures.

✅ Rest without guilt. God created Sabbath because we are not meant to run on empty. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)

✅ Ask for help. Parenting was never meant to be done alone. Lean on your community. Lean on God.

Final Words of Hope

You are not your past. You are not your exhaustion. Through God’s grace, you are writing a new story—one of love, humility, and connection. Your child doesn’t need a perfect mom. They need you—tired, flawed, but full of love that keeps trying. And that is more than enough.

🌸 Journaling Prompts for Reflection

How can I invite God’s grace into my parenting today?
In what small way did I choose connection today?
Where am I trying to parent in my own strength? Where can I ask God for help?
How can I offer myself the same forgiveness I would offer my child?

🌼 Gentle Reminders from What to Expect When You’re Expecting

Rest when you can; small moments of renewal make a difference.
Seek help for mood struggles—you are not alone, and support is available.
Let go of perfection; “good enough” is exactly what your child needs.

🌟 Quiet Affirmation

Even when I am tired, God is my strength. My love is real. By His grace, it is enough.

Faith-Based Reflection Guide for Exhausted Mothers

Perfectionism often grows out of love—a deep desire to do well, protect, and give your best. But it can also leave you feeling weary, stretched thin, and uncertain. This gentle guide invites you to rest in God’s grace and trust that your imperfect, faithful efforts are enough.

Set aside a few quiet moments to reflect, journal, or pray through these questions.

1️⃣ How can I lean on God’s grace in this season of motherhood?

➡ “My grace is sufficient for you, for My power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9)💭 Reflection: Where might I be trying to carry too much on my own? What would it feel like to let God help carry the load?

2️⃣ How can I focus on connection rather than striving for more than I can give?

➡ “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8)💭 Reflection: What small, loving action could bring me closer to my child today, even if everything else feels unfinished?

3️⃣ How can I offer myself the same kindness I give so freely to my child?

➡ “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32)💭 Reflection: If I spoke to myself the way I speak to my child on hard days, what would I say?

4️⃣ Where do I need God’s guidance as I parent?

➡ “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault.” (James 1:5)💭 Reflection: What decision or challenge could I bring to God today, trusting Him to guide me with gentleness?

5️⃣ What would receiving rest from God look like for me today?

➡ “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28)💭 Reflection: How can I make space—however small—for quiet, renewal, or peace today?

🙏 Prayer Plan for Exhausted Mothers

These prayers are here to encourage you—not because you need to pray “just right,” but because God delights in your honest heart. Use them over a few days or whenever you need them.

A Prayer for Strength

Lord, You know how much I want to do well as a mom. Some days I feel like I fall short, and I’m so tired. Please fill me with Your strength. Help me remember that I don’t have to do this alone. Your grace is enough for today. Amen.➡ “I can do all this through Him who gives me strength.” (Philippians 4:13)

A Prayer for Gentleness

God, when I’m weary, it’s hard to respond gently. Please soften my heart, even in my tiredness. Help me reflect Your kindness to my child and to myself. Amen.➡ “Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near.” (Philippians 4:5)

A Prayer for Guidance

Father, sometimes I feel unsure of what to do. I want to parent wisely, with love and grace. Please give me insight, help me see what matters most, and lead me gently. Amen.➡ “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God... and it will be given.” (James 1:5)

A Prayer for Rest

Jesus, I’m tired in body and soul. Thank You for inviting me to rest in You. Help me trust that even when I pause, You are still at work. Let Your peace fill my heart. Amen.

A Prayer for Connection

Lord, help me notice the small moments where I can connect with my child today. Let me see the beauty in our ordinary interactions. Show me that my love is enough, even when I feel stretched thin. Amen.